Longing

Have you ever longed for "the next step" so much that it made you miserable in your "hear and now"? That's where I have been the past few months. I've had a craving for the next step in life. I don't know what it looks likes or even what it is. I've just been saying, "it's not this". This isn't what I want to be doing for the rest of my life. I've looked online thinking maybe more education, maybe I need to schedule a meeting with this or that person, and tell then my vision/dreams for the future. Let's get real. I don't even know what that is. When these thoughts have come to my mind, God has nicely reminded of the time when He told me not to continue my education more. I know that sounds crazy but it really happened about 6-8 months before I graduated with my bachelors degree. He has also reminded me of the times when I have tried to rush in front of Him before and the times He has so clearly showed me the next step and guided me along the way. 

The past couple of weeks and mainly this week, God has shown me that He has me in this place now to grow and strengthen me. He is giving me the tools that I will need in order to do what's next. Just this week if I wouldn't have been in a certain meeting, I would not have been able to later speak the truth that I had learned earlier that day to a friend. I had no idea while I was in that meeting that God was arranging a meeting time that only He could arrange. His timing was perfect. As I sat there that night, God softly spoke to me and reminded me that He has it under control. I need to stop running from the place of life that I'm in now, and allow Him to grow me. If I don't gain the knowledge from the things now, I will not be able to do what's next.

With all of that said, my prayer is that God will continue to change my attitude. I know that this step is necessary for me to able to do the next step efficiently. I want to stop hating this place in life and start enjoying it. I know God has a purpose for it. His path in life is always way better then my wondering in the desert.

Much Love,

Kandice